The role books play in my life

On so many occasions, my younger sister has made comments to me about being almost exactly like my mother in terms of behavior. In so many ways i agree, just like my mum, i always pick up receipts, even when i buy candy. I also constantly find myself trying to help those around me. One of the very best traits that my mother imbibed in me is a passion for personal development.

Every now and then, i admire my little library of novels and personal development books, a majority of which my mother gave to me. My priceless collection comprises of a Robin Sharma collection about greatness,some sidney sheldon novels, biographies of some prominent figures, whom I admire and a couple of books about wealth, finance and investing.

These books serve as a major support system of my life, they not only spur my creativity but they serve as a major guidance to lead me to my goals. The more I read, the more excited I am about what the future holds and I am more driven to work on being a better me. The roles that books have played in my life has given me knowledge about industries, governments and even countries I have never knew existed.

Every time I read a book, I feel like I am talking to someone and hearing their story, belief and advice. Its like a whole new world to me as I feel like I am in a conversation with someone who has a message,I absorb attentively as i come to understand my authors and what they stand for. A fundamental observation that I believe that most books try to communicate is the need for we as humans to constantly seek to develop ourselves disregarding our age or status, in order to keep pace with the world.

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My favorite setting 

Nowhere else is so peaceful and harmonious to nature than a beach located in a jungle. 

Imagine the lucious green trees in different shapes and sizes.Its almost impossible to not see a beautiful imagery with an harmonious rhythm to nature. Sounds like the garden of Eden.

I would happily spend my whole life in such a setting, if only I had no cares or responsibilities.

I would run through the jungle daily, with a scared excitement that I would not come in contact with any scary animal. I’d use such a place to learn how to climb the trees.I’d meditate peacefully in the morning and learn how to swim.

I’d eat the fruits from the trees when I’m hungry, stare into the skies and take long naps right infront of the shore. I’d write on rocks and roll in the sands carelessly. 

On such a setting, I would make dance steps to songs I’d make, make friends with some of the animals I meet there and drink coconut drinks to quench my thirst.

I wonder if such a place so peaceful and wonderful really exists.

And if so, I wonder if my parents will let me stay there. 

Such a place will be fueled with so much happiness, joy and content. And hopefully, far from human corruption, envy and hatred. 

Just an island full of so much love. 

The Summer of Change

The music of another room started out slowly and soon I was curious to find out what was in the room . I looked behind the curtains and there it lay; a stark difference from where I was. A more focused life, happier and full of so much self-confidence and self worth, created to inspire. The furniture offered all the personal attributes I have ever dreamed of.
I was faced between two things; remain in the past and hope that things get better or make moves to plan towards the future. 

I looked back to my present room,” I had gotten so used to it, i was done living like this, I was done moving around the roller coaster and slides” 

Looking at all the old furniture and spoilt pillows, I smiled at how naive I had once been and I was glad about everything. It was a time of change in all dimensions of my life. 

Happily, I stepped a foot into the other side and fearlessly walked towards the person I have always been trying to be. 

if you want to change your life to all you have ever dreamed of, all you have to do to change yourself. You don’t need new people in your life or new government in your economy, it all has do with is a change of you”-Jim Rohn 

What does it take to be genuinely happy ? Part II

I’m writing this post specially for those who lack self confidence and are constantly drowned in depression by what others or circumstances have done to them.

Even if you do not fall into those categories you are still welcome to read this post.

Before I continue, it’s important for me to highlight that I am not a guru of knowledge or anything close to that, I’m simply a lover of life and my only wish is to help people feel better about themselves in any way I can. 

I would honestly recommend anyone looking for genuine and constant happiness to read “The monk who sold his Ferrari” by Robin Sharma. If you are so keen on being a happy person, just like me, that book is essential.

Anyways, happiness is a matter a perspective. Due to this, my thesis here is “Change your perspective of your life & Change your reality”  

How can you do this ? 

I have a story that relates to the point about changing perspectives. Yesterday, I met a guy at the place where I currently have my calculus lessons and we spoke for quite a while. As usual, I asked him questions about himself and what he was doing at the lesson. He told me that he was meant to be in college a long time ago and has been hustling to gather money up to do so. Before I asked any other questions, he began to dwell on how life has been unfair to him financially and even physically due to his smallish statue. I was shocked at how someone could actually use their words to almsot describe their lives as sort of miserable. In less than five minutes, I knew how sad and depressed he was over all the bad things that have happened in his life and hindered him from going to college. 

Although, I ended up trying to remind him of the blessings of life.He shrugged and agreed that life “wasn’t so bad” after all but looking at him I could still tell that he was still so stuck on how life hasn’t been fair on him. People like that end up believing that nothing good can come out of their lives. How can they be happy when they are dwelling on their troubles instead of their blessings ?

In order words, the things we dwell and think about much, shapen how sad or happy we are. Then, why do we often pick the sad things ? 

It’s easy for us to conclude that there is nothing special about us. In fact, it’s probably the easiest thing especially when people in our lives have disappointed us and insulted us. We easily feel that we are not special simply because no one compliments us often or we feel clumsy or awkward. I use the word “feel” because most times,it’s the  beautiful  ones that feel this way. 


More so, I also meet a student in that same lesson who has been trying to gain admission into the university since 2012. Unlike many others I have met, who are reluctant to tell people how long they have been seeking admission, this guy told me something very much different. 

“The most important thing is not to ever give up and I’m still keen on being an engineer” 

Talk about perspective. While the first guy sees his life as a mess and believes   that the world hasn’t been fair to him. The second guy, despite all his failures and untold setbacks, believes in himself that he was doing the most important thing by never giving up. 

I’m not going to conclude that the second guy is actually a happy person because I really do not know what goes on in his mind everytime.However, I can tell you that he feels so much better about himself than the first guy. Why ?

It’s simply because he has different perspective of his life. He believes in himself and sees his present condition as a stage, while the first guy is drowned in his negative potentials, this guy is focused on not giving up because he believes that just like everyone else he is “smart enough and good enough”.

These real life individuals I met explain why some people despite having all the nessciates and grace of life still spend their lives feeling like they aren’t good enough. Happiness is all about believing in yourself and everything you do. It’s knowing that you are imperfect and not caring about what anyone else thinks. 

It’s about self appreciation and reinterpretation of your life in a postive way. How can you do this ?

It all starts with your mind.

Instead of saying to yourself; “my business failed, I’m such a hopeless loser compared to most of my successful friends” 

Say; “I can never fail at any thing I do and this is just a lesson that will eventually lead to my big success” 

Instead of saying; ” people around me do not like me, no one ever compliments me”

Say to yourself in front of the mirror;”I am beautiful and I know it.”

They are so many other examples of how to change your setbacks into postive things. The minute you can get used to becoming a postive person in interpreting your life experiences, your life will never become the same again 

Many good stories started badly and ended well. Start seeing yourself the clumsy kunfu panda who eventually became the best fighter in his town, the ugly duckling turning into a swan. Appreciate where your life is now and believe that it would only get better. And just like the law of attraction says, whatever you believe in eventually happens.

I would like to point out that it is almost if not,totally impossible to always be happy. Life will always have something important to teach us and sometimes pain makes us understand ourselves better if we patient to learn from our experiences. 

In fact, everytime I don’t do so well in a test or something bad happens to me, I mostly spend my time thinking about my situation; changing my perspective of it and reinterpreting it.

You can only love life if you love yourself and appreciate your experiences.

Start reinterpreting your life and you’d start seeing that your life will be far better than it is now. Re write your story, ensure it leads to a happy ending. Most importantly, believe in yourself ❤️

Hope this helped someone out there. 

If you have any private  questions, need my help  or want me to write about a particular topic, you can email me (emmamattie@yahoo.com) 

Part III will be talking about how to attract the right people into your life. 

Death

 


How do we explain what death is?     

How do we understand it and get through the death of our loved ones?

They didn’t deserve it.

It all happened so quick, unexpected.

Do we get to say our last words?

How do we console our loved ones and ourselves?

When do we get through this?

 They slip away from us in the aisle of death and we can only hope that one day we will be reunited again as souls.

 

No one really deserves to die, so when death comes we are unable to know how to feel.

We hold on to depression and anguish.

Tears flood out during sleepless nights.

No, our lives will never be the same again.

The memories only make us feel worse.

We remember the events that they promised to attend for us.

We remember the imaginary happy moments we planned with them.

Did we tell them we loved them enough?

Did they know how we truly felt?

So many questions that need answers and we can only stay strong and watch as the waves move on slowly with remembrance just like we will.

 In honor of a very good friend’s mum, Mrs Joyce Asuwata. 

May her beautiful soul rest in perfect peace 🙏🏽

A legendary beginning 

 

Currently I’m into the whole Richdad.com financial coaching. It’s honestly one of the best things that has happened to me all year.

I’m learning so much about making financial plans and investing. The best part is that I just found myself in love with real estate. I’m still carrying out a lot of research on investments and real estate. I even went to a deserted building to ask if it were for sale. It wasn’t for sale though but it took a lot of guts.

However, carrying out all the financial plans I currently have in mind require that I am ready to accept that initially I may fail. In other words I must be ready to win or learn. 

I believe so much in this because passion and dedication can only bring success.

Leave them breathless


Unlike animals, humans are probably the most emotionally sensitive creatures alive. I can remember while growing up with four dogs in our home, my parents usually disciplined my dogs anytime anyone of them acted up. In fact, an event I can clearly recall was when my dad’s favorite, Lailai, purposely tried to beat up her grandma. My dad cautioned her to stop as she attacked the older dog but she ignored him and continued on. To cut the long story short, in order to stop the fight and avoid the grandma from incurring more injuries like she has had over the years, my dad thoroughly beat Lailai so much that I felt very bad for her. However, regardless of the number of times my parents disciplined my dogs, they have never for once seemed like they do not feel like a part of our family. In fact, they constantly seem to be excited to be a part of it. They still jump into the car every time we get home and they still jump on our beds to wake us up some mornings. Unlike many human beings, who are easily shaped by the actions of those around them, animals take more time to understand actions that are carried out with hatred and are not so sensitive to the actions of those around them. Unless in extremely bizarre cases.This realization of humans as extremely sensitive struck me only just recently through one of my favorite friend. 

One of the best people I have honestly ever met. She is such a sweet, pleasant, friendly and pretty girl and most days I can only wonder how my life this year may have been without her. Since few like her ever do exist, I was very eager to learn about her. Learn about what she likes and hates, how and why she is so kind and understand her better as a person. I find this very important because understanding people close to you makes you know how to put them in the best moods and avoid doing things that may get them angry or upset. In the process of this, I found a very fragile girl with a self-esteem that had weakened, as she grew older. She had grown up being made to feel that without makeup she looked extremely ugly and almost man-like. Some of those around her had also convinced her that the pimples on her face were horrific and that her lips needed a surgery. In fact, I was almost speechless the day she confided some of these things to me. And I was even more shocked that she believed them. Degraded words about her lips have been continuously uttered to her, by people who she may never be able to avoid. They included some close family members and childhood friends. What shocked me most about this was that, she is an extremely beautiful girl, her pimples were almost far from being obvious and if she had never pointed out that her lips had an issue, I may died never knowing about it. In fact, she is one of those girls that one may even be scared to invite to their weddings haha.

My point here is this, be kind in your words and actions to those around you in EVERY SINGLE WAY YOU CAN. Not everyone knows how beautiful and admirable they look and even those who know, need to be reminded regularly. Encourage your friends and family members with honest and good compliments, and watch them bloom their confidence like flowers. Leave them so breathless with love that they never doubt that they are important and special. The fact that my gorgeous friend was able to open up to me doesn’t means that your friend and my other friends, who may be like her, will do the same. Every now and then, I have taken it upon myself to fill my heart with love and make those around me feel breathlessly confident of themselves, due to this discovery. Nonetheless, in any way you can, seek to make the world a better place, and how else can you show love if its not to those around you?